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Hi, I'm not sure if this a problem for other people, but I actually find the 2nd 2 meditation exercises in step 1 to be easier than the first (conscious observation of thoughts).
It's said that you are to observe your thoughts without consciously interacting with them. My problem is when I do this, (being conscious of my self/thoughts) I just get a blank mind with absolutely no thoughts, I can't THINK on anything because that requires conscious interaction with the mind. If I wait for a thought...and I receive one, it's only because I lost focus of my intent to observe, but as soon as I realize this and attempt at observing the thought, the thought goes dead and stagnent, or rather leaves an after trail of it's "feeling"..."essence?" for me to observe.
I am naturally very introspective. I spent the majority of my childhood inside my head (leaving me with no social skills lol). I have a very strong sense for subconscious/divine suggestion and almost always freeze frame/replay any abstract feelings. BUT NEVER in my life have I been able to just observe my own thoughts intelligently construct themselves through any kind of process without apply that construction with my own consciousness. If this was the case I could just watch a movie while I think about my life's problems in the background. If I'm looking in the wrong direction and am only supposed to observe feelings or instinctive intentions then I'm good to go I suppose...
Though, essentially, shouldn't conscious awareness of one's self and the moment of "NOW" without breaking focus be sufficient? I mean my mind is empty (except of feelings) unless I invoke thought.
I apologize if I appeared ignorant at any point. Thanks for any and all advice. Have a great day! ;D
Oh, and don't be afraid to give me a shout, I'd love to discuss hermeticism with ANYONE willing.
SylvesterPilgrim
Post subject: RE: Step 1 first mental exercise trouble. Posted: Apr 25, 2009 - 08:05 AM
Joined: Feb 11, 2007
Posts: 10
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There's no hurry. This takes practice. Don't be discouraged.
You may also be trying too hard. If I may...don't "try" to observe, don't try to "observe intelligently." Just observe.
Making the effort is the most important part.
I wish you well.
sevenXwind
Post subject: RE: Step 1 first mental exercise trouble. Posted: Apr 27, 2009 - 03:19 PM
Wow, for such a simple answer, it worked quite well O_O. Nicely done, thank you : )
I've been at this for probably 15 minutes now with no effort. I guess I was too used to focusing my consciousness to just "let it be".
I actually separated myself from my mind the other day to the point where I was probably listening to the same song for 2 hours without taking mental notice to it but maybe 2-3 times. Ended up having a panic attack (which I also only partially noticed lol). Guess I learned that the mind and spirit need to grow in unity. It's fun finding how much depth there is in the most plausible of knowledge.
Theophilus
Post subject: RE: Step 1 first mental exercise trouble. Posted: Oct 20, 2009 - 11:44 AM
Joined: Jan 14, 2008
Posts: 14
Status: Offline
That experience of yours, losing yourself in music for that long, is not 'separating yourself from your mind' but from your nervous impulses, becoming a passenger in your life -- that 's not what you want, but I guess if you are still on ex. 1, you will not deal with that until the first part of ex. 2?
As for your 1st problem, you simply have to continue! Make careful notes in your diary about the disorientation you feel, because it may be useful later. (You are very influenced by the media you use, it is they that run your system while you are in those states.)
You probably would be diagnosed with mild asperger's by some, not that that should worry you.
All the things you mention as contents in your mind -- the 'feeling/essence' in a thought, the 'subconscious/divine suggestion', 'abstract feelings', etc. -- it is *all* just thoughts. The point is to remain indifferent to it.
I know how your problem feels because I was just the same! You are used to *answering* your thoughts so quickly in rapid succession, you are used to thinking that 'thoughts' involves the thinking process. What is actually going to happen is that you will perceive the thoughts and the thinking process dying down, as you let go of it. It is being run by the nervous system and it will gradually slow, *unless* you keep moving the thoughts on by exploring them.
You can try this: Start out the exercise by thinking in the normal way, and get a good train of thought going first, then begin to observe with complete indifference instead of joining in, and do not worry at all about what the thoughts become. Eventually you will find you can stand back from the process entirely.
Another tip: If you don't do it already, try doing a progressive relaxation exercise for 15 mins./day. This tends to help - bodily tension prevents the Indifference you want. If you decide to do that exercise stick with it because the effects are cumulative. A year of relaxing 15 mins/day will transform anyone's life, even with no more training.
(If you read the 'Kybalion' about the "I" and "Me" consciousnesses, that might help you here.)
At first you will get involved in the thoughts still -- it doesn't matter, just continue. Anything you experience at all counts as a thought. Gradually you will see that the process can continue without your input, and eventually it can slow down *by itself* -- you do nothing to slow it. You will be left with a nice silence and easefulness.
If I were you I would try not to get so lost in the media, start to try noticing when this happens.
NEVER worry if you don't succeed the first time. Just hold the intention.
And NEVER apologize if you 'seem ignorant', you don't anyhow, but even if you did, so what? You have the right not to know stuff and to ask about it! That's what we all do, that's how we learn...
Hope this helps. Sorry that it is the opposite of the short, elegant answer of SylvesterPilgrim!
Development of the Human Spirit
